Blast from the past? Haha. Another article from two years ago.

My friends and I have fallen prey to a host of events these past few months, events that have forced me, us, to re-examine our conceptions of self and our perspectives of the world.

Personally, I have been victim to a most vicious heartbreak and the moving-on phase following it that almost took forever (364 days, to be exact). This heartbreak not only challenged my notion of myself but also shook my world, radically altering my belief in myself and my hopes and dreams. But just when all seemed lost and I thought I was going to be living the rest of my life as an embittered and miserable creature, God’s light shone through and gave me true salvation.

Friends A1, A2, N, and S, on the other hand, have also not been spared from the heart-wrenching that is part and parcel of loving: A1 is now separated by an immense span of distance from her love, and were it not the case, she would still be uncertain if the feeling is mutual. A2, on the other hand, is now suffering because of a situation that she feels she has wrought upon herself, this despite the fact that it is no one’s fault, and despite having held on for so long. S, on the other hand, has lost all interest in playing the game called love with the former object of her desire, while N lost a love she has had for the longest time. Tsk, tsk.

It’s such a sad thing, considering that the love we all had to offer was nothing short of genuine, true, and all-accepting, warts and all. Still, the world got the better of our love, and fantasy ultimately gave way to reality. Dreams of happy ever after and love eternal crumbled before the cruel and unyielding realization that, in the real world, some things just aren’t meant to be, regardless of how much you hope and wish for them.

It is this sad fact that has led me to question the age-old belief that love conquers all. If love is indeed capable of conquering all, why did it fail us, and countless others besides? What were we lacking? What trait did we have that set us apart from the halves of couples happily strolling in Loveland? Did Love’s powers run out just as it was about to bestow upon us that elusive grace (check operator service baga, sa dami ng binigyan, sa amin naubusan) that we so covet?

A million questions are buzzing about inside of my head as regards this facet of love: what are the requisites for it to hold true, if ever it does? Is there a secret formula for it, a secret ritual that must be accomplished for its fruition and realization? Is there a price that must first be paid before we attain such a level of love? What? I need to know, in order that I may be able to impart the knowledge to my friends, and anyone in need of love, for that matter.

Though my belief in the adage about love conquering all is in the throes of death, my belief in the proposition that all we need is love has only been reaffirmed. The world as we formed it seems to be programmed to instill the desire to be loved to most everyone that enmeshes themselves in it, this when it has no plans of satiating this desire. Thus, a lot of us are left with meager scraps of love when what we need and hope for are heaps and heaps of the stuff. Some are embittered, most are broken, and almost all are left with the knowledge that, even though the ones they love may choose to see them, these do not see them with the same affection, love, and longing that the hopeful and hopeless do. Let be, let be.